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I can't understand guys that dig ultra-thin women.


Queen Victoria

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Anyone else with me on this? And I'm not talking about just 'slender' girls. Hell, the other day I posted a video of two Japanese chicks making out who were very much 'average' sized. They were soft in places and had big breasts, but they were in no way, shape or form fat.

No, what I'm talking about here are guys who want a woman with virtually 0% body fat -- a woman where you can see ribs, a collar bone, neck tendons, etc; the true size zero. Especially on the internet, there seems to be the ideal where you're not a "true bro" unless you're chasing that kind of girl, and all other men must be mocked.

Like, just as an example, World of Warcraft (a video game) has recently announced a revamp of their character models. The females in WoW are, by any sane definition, thin. They are not, however, emaciated. And there has been a concerted push to get the redesign team to make them downright skeletal in their thinness. It's left me and a lot of other people scratching their heads.

What is with this obsession with unhealthy weights? I can definitely understand (though not myself appreciate) chasing smaller girls. What I cannot understand is wanting a woman so slender that she's basically turned into a malnourished 8-year-old boy. What's the draw there? When you grab hold of a girl and all you clutch is a protruding bone, how is that hot for anyone? And why would someone want to look at that?

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Basically, you like what you like.

On the other hand, if you take out the judgmentalism from HM's post, it does pose an interesting question. Why do we like what we like, especially if what we like happens to be on the extremes of the spectrum of what most people like, be it super fat or super skinny? Or why does anybody have the sexual preferences, kinks, or fetishes that they do? Is there something in peoples' upbringing that makes BDSM, or being an FA, or having a foot fetish, or whatever fill some psychological need, or is there a BDSM gene somewhere? And if you are predisposed to having a kink, why one rather than another? Because even if you have a kink or unusual preference, any kink you don't have feels just as weird as it does to someone who prefers vanilla with no kinks. Just like how Victoria can't comprehend a preference for super skinny women, while simultaneously having an out-of-the-norm preference for fat women (I presume).

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Basically, you like what you like.

On the other hand, if you take out the judgmentalism from HM's post, it does pose an interesting question. Why do we like what we like, especially if what we like happens to be on the extremes of the spectrum of what most people like, be it super fat or super skinny? Or why does anybody have the sexual preferences, kinks, or fetishes that they do? Is there something in peoples' upbringing that makes BDSM, or being an FA, or having a foot fetish, or whatever fill some psychological need, or is there a BDSM gene somewhere? And if you are predisposed to having a kink, why one rather than another? Because even if you have a kink or unusual preference, any kink you don't have feels just as weird as it does to someone who prefers vanilla with no kinks. Just like how Victoria can't comprehend a preference for super skinny women, while simultaneously having an out-of-the-norm preference for fat women (I presume).

I would argue stongly that a good deal of the 'bro-ism' that seems to drive the quest for the thinnest girl isn't fetishism at all... it's some kind of crude, basal game of one-upsmanship. IE, these people may not find super thin all that sexy, but are so frightened of deviating from the perceived norm that they are willing to shelve their own sexuality to achieve supremacy. I'm not saying there aren't people out there who find Lady Skeletors sexy, I just believe it's lower than it polls.

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I could, because I certainly don't believe a woman who is 600+ is attractive. Just because something is the opposite extreme doesn't mean I support it.

Then why this thread?!
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In some ancient cultures massive hips represented fertility, some carvings were found some of them represented goddesses others might have just been pregnant ladies trying to represent themselves in art. In modern times, having kids is pretty easy and this obsession has been mostly lost on the general population. Out of maybe psychological reasons and/or coincidental nature some of us still get boners from big fat hips. The general public now accept the opposite of a man to represent ultra feminine. Just invert abig hairy football player and you have the ideal woman now. As thin as possible, as hairless as possible, as glittery as...you get the idea. Some people like the new icon, some people like the old, many fit somewhere between this or not at all on the chart and have never considered any of this.

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I don't understand it either. I've always thought collar bones and a "gap in the thighs" was weird and gross. What pisses me off is that women are made to feel like this an ideal they are supposed to achieve with all the thinspiration crap. i've seen many women lose  their beautiful curves to make their bodies like that. it's tragic. And furthermore, it encourages anorexia. Now there are some women that just naturally have that body type, but most women don't. So you know how they reach their goal size zero? you guessed it. eating disorder.

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We're starting to see the thin ideal disappear. It's taking a while, but it's been going on since the early 2000s now...there is a shift underway toward more muscular for women. I feel lucky, b/c that's what I prefer. Some of you might not like it and would think it's just as bad as stick thin, but you should still be happier, because it's also not stick thin anymore! The ideal body shapes are a little curvier now, and definitely bigger and say 20 lbs heavier than back in 2000.

Girl on the left here is the new ideal if you live near New York city, LA California, or Florida:

It does take a lot of gym work and eating more to pull it off, but we're going to see this more and more over the next few years.

The girl on the right is still a bit too thin, but she's working on getting bigger lke her friend. Trust me, I'm in the fitness world...today women want bigger butts and thighs, and some are willing to workout hard and purposely overeat a bit to gain more muscle and boobage. Bulking is the same as the stuffing that fat women do, and fat IS gained in the process. Just that more of it goes to muscle because the person is lifting weights and not eating ridiculous amounts beyond what they need.

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I try not to judge since what I like might be considered weird by others. Liking someone who is very thin is no different from preferring your partner to be very fat. I try to see their way of thinking even if I don't agree with it, because I can understand how it is to like something and not really be sure why you like it, but know whole heartedly that it's absolutely what you like, and an integral part of who you are as a person.

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I don't really get it.

My range is pretty wide. It's more like a bell curve with soft and chubby in the middle. That said at a certain point I am squeamish thinking about being with a lady that is too thin. Not that I consider that their only worth, just if you ask me what I find attractive.

As for the muscular curvy girl look, I always like a certain amount of flesh over the top, firm is ok, but hard is not my thing.

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Same here. Muscular girls are not hot. Being too thin destroys the female form... being too fat destroys the female form... and, no surprise, being too buff destroys it, too.

So, basically what you're saying is that any shape of a woman that doesn't appeal to you, makes her less of a woman?

Did I get that right?

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So, basically what you're saying is that any shape of a woman that doesn't appeal to you, makes her less of a woman?

Did I get that right?

Well, for him it seems to be. Nothing innerently wrong with that.
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ITT: "Serious discussion"

I know it's still 2013 and I've already posted once this year about this, but if it's important for dudes in this forum to understand why women who choose to share themselves and their photos/videos with the forum sometimes bail out and vanish, never to be seen again, it's important to understand this thread.

It seems there are a few tropes that emerge when contributing female posters leave the community. They were never really into FA stuff in general, or they were just looking to cash in  on a paysite, or they lost weight for some superficial reasoning. I submit that its none of these things that makes them go, and it's also nothing so alien and strange about the community, (e.g. they discovers feeders and bail) either. Rather, it's a very familiar phenomenon: men policing women's bodies.

I know it's true for me, and I know it's true for my partner whom I've met on another unnamed pink-and-yellow site, and I know it's true for several other men and women in the FA community I've had the pleasure of becoming friends with, that when I first found the community online (way back in the yahoogroups days) I was excited. I was excited because it represented to me a chance to connect with people who felt the same way I do about my (fat) body, after years of hearing the contrary from all sectors of society/media. I thought that sites like this one were ones where bodies of size were celebrated, and if one body type wasn't preferred, at least it wouldn't be poked and prodded and sniped at and criticized, because we all (and I mean straight FA dudes here, the vast majority of the user base of the community) knew what it was like to feel like we were alone with our unorthodox preferences in the world.

Of course, however, trends emerge, distinguishing criticism sneaks in. I prefer pears to apples, blondes to brunettes, 400 to 300 to 200. I prefer nerd girls. I prefer this ethnicity to that one. I prefer gainers. This ranking became pervasive, and left largely unchecked by the community, it crystallizes. It informs the place. It chills, and then the preferences are restated, now exclusionary. Why would you ruin your body with a tattoo? Nice body, but she's a butterface (never said to a female poster directly, but rather about women in the general categories and candids), she used to be hot but now she's getting too big, that dyed hair doesn't look good on her, etc. I don't believe that this culture comes about as the result of some nefarious misogynist plot, but rather general patriarchy supported by privilege.

This is hardly a problem unique to Curvage or the FA community, but the internet is the domain of the id. We type things we would never say on the regular mainly because we can get away with it. And the usual response to a post like this (if anyone bothers to read it) is that "this is a discussion forum, we're just having a discussion" or some misinformed Constitutionalist going on about free speech rights. To quote the Big Lebowski, "You're not wrong, you're just an asshole." It's more a matter of having a discussion about what type of forum we want to have. It kind of stinks because the people who get to shape this are the most frequent posters, and possibly the ones who feel most entitled to contribute their opinion, however brief, to any thread.

People (women included) join sites like this all the time, and we'll continue what has been a fairly consistent pattern of scaring off enthusiastic new joiners not by giving them something different than the mainstream, but rather just becoming another echo chamber for the dehumanizing, misogynistic message that they ca get far more easily elsewhere.

tl;dr - All bodies are cool and awesome. No one cares about what you don't like, so just compliment things you find attractive and zip it about things you don't. It's that easy.

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Oh, my. The amount of misogyny in here is making it hard to breath.

If a man were too skinny, short, fat, tall, muscular, etc. would that make him less of a man? There seems to be a severe lack of men in this thread, but not because of their bodies.

Some 800 lbs dude lying on his bed for life is "the same of a man" as some "normal" looking guy?

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