Jump to content

Why I dont think I will date large BBW's anymore


cupido

Recommended Posts

So to begin with, and like most of you, I prefer larger women.

Unfortunately since I've been single this year I have begun to experiment with many different women who come in many different sizes. Now, when I have watched porn in the past my tastes have varied: I've liked the chubby girls with plumps bellies, but I have also enjoy the huge SSBBW who have fat in absolute abundance. However, since I've actually began to sleep around I've noticed the things we like on the screen isn't always the things we like in the flesh.

Moreover, I've noticed it is the issue of dating larger BBW's (over 250lbs) where it can begin to become problems. And do not get me wrong - I think they are stunning, but I think I may not be able to get over some of the issues that come with it.

Here are some of my experiences of the negatives:

-Snoring (I didn't know this is common but 4 out of 7 large bbw's I have slept with have snored and its been a massive deal breaker).

-Oral sex is so much harder to give and sometimes they smell a little more (I know it is awful to say but I've noticed they do not taste as good - this isn't, however, an issue with just plumpish women)

-Positions: It's harder to get positions right and it is also harder to dominate them (if that's what you like) because of the logistics.

-Social Stigma: I actually dislike society more for this but I do get people asking me why I sleep with a fat woman - I do answer honestly that I like them but it isn't always nice to be asked. Plus, sometimes you get stares in the street because I am athletic and they are large and we simply do not much (this example isn't that important though).

-Guilt: for the ones who had weight related injuries, like bad knees, It made me feel a little guilty for liking them in a shape that was ultimately hurting them (I'll probably get insulted for saying this)

 

So there you have it. But I also want to convey that I was very much attracted to each of the women I had sex with and we had good times regardless. It was just a surprise to see that some of my fantasies that I like do not work so well in real life. And perhaps for the future I will only date chubby to fat women (150-250lbs range).

Has anyone else had similar experiences?

(note: these are just my opinions and they aren't written to offend but I imagine they just might. So apologies in advance)

(note 2: I'm spending a year sexually experimenting - please do not think of me as some player)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I wrote about this once. I always found I preferred girls who were chubby to small bbw, but over the years my tastes expanded, so I had a fling with a girl around 350-400 lbs, and I found it really underwhelming. The fantasy just didn't really translate well to real life for me, and I was disappointed. The oral sex sucked (and I tend to love going down), it was super hard to manipulate her body, and overall just really unexciting. That's not to say that things might have been better if we had got creative, but I didn't care for it, and I'll probably never go back. So I wouldn't feel guilty or alone if I were you. I think a lot of people on this site might have similar experiences given the opportunity, but there is someone out there for everybody, and if a more traditional sexual experience is more your style, then that's that. There are plenty of men out there that I'm sure are attracted enough to SSBBW's that these challenges are not an issue.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 hours ago, MUSEic said:

I wrote about this once. I always found I preferred girls who were chubby to small bbw, but over the years my tastes expanded, so I had a fling with a girl around 350-400 lbs, and I found it really underwhelming. The fantasy just didn't really translate well to real life for me, and I was disappointed. The oral sex sucked (and I tend to love going down), it was super hard to manipulate her body, and overall just really unexciting. That's not to say that things might have been better if we had got creative, but I didn't care for it, and I'll probably never go back. So I wouldn't feel guilty or alone if I were you. I think a lot of people on this site might have similar experiences given the opportunity, but there is someone out there for everybody, and if a more traditional sexual experience is more your style, then that's that. There are plenty of men out there that I'm sure are attracted enough to SSBBW's that these challenges are not an issue.

Yeah, it is interesting to see how out fantasies online often differ from what we like in real life.

We probably have a lot of posters on this site who have never been with a ssbbw so they will never know until they try it

Link to comment
Share on other sites

there are some drawbacks for sure. there have to be some. 

it may be not a big deal for a woman to gain some weight during her twenties but you cannot expect a ssbbw to live comfortably into her eighties wich you would like her to do if you plan on falling in love for example. so hearing my wife getting out of breath for walking a few steps or climbing some stairs is not cool and yes it does diminish you quality of life in certain ways. 

snooring happens and that is not pleasant. sometimes you have to deal with big insecurities as well and a world that is not kind to obese people. but man, bbw;s are so hot ! 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I actually had a similar experience to this myself not long ago, having found myself disappointed by third base with a woman much larger than my previous biggest partner.

Even sitting on the couch cuddling and watching TV was awkward, since her wide hips and massive ass made her a lot taller than me sitting down, so I could just barely reach my arm around her shoulders/waist. When things got more in-depth, I found I had to struggle to balance myself on one arm, and thus only had a single hand free and a limited part of her I could reach, while her hands had full reign over my body. I fear she may have gotten the impression that I wasn't as "into it" as her as a result, when in reality I was working so hard that afterwards I felt myself trembling and out of breath from the exertion.

There was also the fact that I could smell something unpleasant coming off of her, and during the act I realized there are probably parts of her body that she can't wash unassisted. While I know it's not her fault and I'm sure she tries to keep herself clean, the idea still comes as a turn-off.

I'm still weighing my feelings on the issue and I'm not ready to say I'd never try again, with her specifically or with any woman of her size, but I can definitely sympathize with the OP about underestimating the downsides of supersize intimacy. All the wonderful SSBBW members and paysite models around here certainly do a good job of spoiling us, don't they?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 11/27/2016 at 0:19 PM, Luvpears said:

Fuck you for letting the social stigma affect how you feel. Go back into your closet.

Is this a joke?  I hope you mean "act" instead of "feel."  Or maybe I'm missing the sarcasm.

I think there is courage in trying to overcome a social stigma to ensure that it doesn't affect your actions.  No shame in having feelings, though, and talking about them openly.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Save me from your fake outrage.

He just got done saying it makes him feel differently toward larger women when he has the social stigma, so he's letting that affect him. Jeez.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

6 hours ago, Luvpears said:

Save me from your fake outrage.

He just got done saying it makes him feel differently toward larger women when he has the social stigma, so he's letting that affect him. Jeez.

We are social beings - forged by the world around us.

Nobody is impervious to the disapproving gaze - some people just get better at dealing with it.

And as the other poster helped explain - I was just expressing a thought about dating a large bbw - and there is nothing wrong with expressing thoughts.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

18 hours ago, CBMH said:

I actually had a similar experience to this myself not long ago, having found myself disappointed by third base with a woman much larger than my previous biggest partner.

Even sitting on the couch cuddling and watching TV was awkward, since her wide hips and massive ass made her a lot taller than me sitting down, so I could just barely reach my arm around her shoulders/waist. When things got more in-depth, I found I had to struggle to balance myself on one arm, and thus only had a single hand free and a limited part of her I could reach, while her hands had full reign over my body. I fear she may have gotten the impression that I wasn't as "into it" as her as a result, when in reality I was working so hard that afterwards I felt myself trembling and out of breath from the exertion.

There was also the fact that I could smell something unpleasant coming off of her, and during the act I realized there are probably parts of her body that she can't wash unassisted. While I know it's not her fault and I'm sure she tries to keep herself clean, the idea still comes as a turn-off.

I'm still weighing my feelings on the issue and I'm not ready to say I'd never try again, with her specifically or with any woman of her size, but I can definitely sympathize with the OP about underestimating the downsides of supersize intimacy. All the wonderful SSBBW members and paysite models around here certainly do a good job of spoiling us, don't they?

Yes, sometimes it is a rich smell that isn't to pleasant, but its hard to describe.

My friend has a theory that a lot of fat women have pcos which makes them smell a little more down there - but this isn't scientific - there aren't any studies on smell and vaginas.

 

Man, this all sounds crude. But it is important to chat about these things otherwise we will not learn new things or know what other people experience!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 11/27/2016 at 5:19 PM, Luvpears said:

Fuck you for letting the social stigma affect how you feel. Go back into your closet.

With respect Luvpears, your attitude is hardly going to contribute to a reduction in either social stigma or closet-habitation. We do nothing for fat people and their admirers by excoriating them for their insecurities.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

-earplugs

-you like giving oral congrats lol

social blah blah; someone randomly asks you why you do something either tell them to fuck off or straight tell them and if they don't like it tell them to go fuck themselves, friend/family tell them you like the person and then tell them to fuck off if they don't like it. Jesus stares in the street because your athletic o_o yell across the street say wtf you looking at you bro. or just stare them down too.

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

3 hours ago, lostonline040 said:

I consider myself a "cunning linguist" and as a married man of a smallish (5'3", 220lbs) bbw who doesnt want to gain, i understand ill never in the foreseeable future have the opportunity to sleep with a ssbbw yet i still find the news that ssbbws arent great to Dine At the Y disappointing

There goes one fantasy :(

 

Well, hey now, I don't think it's fair to take a few anecdotal cases and generalize that to ALL ssbbw's.

Given how many of the women who find their way to this site especially are Fat And Proud, and may even have bulked themselves up on purpose, I would expect they are willing to put more effort into taking good care of themselves and addressing the unique issues that come with their size.

Sadly, many other women likely end up obese as a result of years of the same general self-neglect that causes them to lapse in their hygiene. Or perhaps they aren't willing to take the extra measures to care for their hard-to-reach areas because they don't want to admit that they're too fat to properly keep clean.

I don't think one bad experience is enough to turn me off of SSBBW's forever, especially if she and I really "click" in other ways. But just like Normal Society must inevitably come to terms with the fact that not all intimate relationships are like the ones in the movies, we can benefit from an open discussion about these things.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

7 hours ago, Ryan Lochete said:

-earplugs

-you like giving oral congrats lol

social blah blah; someone randomly asks you why you do something either tell them to fuck off or straight tell them and if they don't like it tell them to go fuck themselves, friend/family tell them you like the person and then tell them to fuck off if they don't like it. Jesus stares in the street because your athletic o_o yell across the street say wtf you looking at you bro. or just stare them down too.

 

You have all the answers. Rational, sensitive & intelligent. They should put a guy like you in the Whitehouse.

Oh.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Goldwing
New member here (on and off lurker, but now an actual member), and I think a lot of what the OP posted about isn't an issue specific to larger women. It's an issue specific to specific women.
 
Each person you're intimate with is going to be a whole new experience. To say that a specific act is ultimately a bad experience with a certain weight class, that isn't really getting to the point of the matter. With one partner, the weight might get in the way or cause issues, yes - but with another, there might be some mutual enjoyment of that, the angles and the working around becoming part of the foreplay. Skinnier women are going to be the same thing - with some specific individuals, some acts just aren't as enjoyable for whatever reason.
 
I've been lucky enough to have a varied set of girlfriends in my life, probably as a result of my early attempts at trying to find out exactly how much I'm into the big girl scene. I can say that I've had terrible experiences and wonderful experiences alike, but in no way do I attribute the success or failure to weight. Instead, it comes down to the individual, how experienced they may be, how adventurous, how emotionally open, how passionate, etc.
 
For me now, knowing that I do love a larger woman, I take everything as it is. I'm in for the whole package, not just the sexual experience. My girlfriend is a stunning beauty, and is quite large, but also wants to get larger. And we've talked about the challenges - and the fun - that will come with that. I think above and beyond all, proper communication with your partner is key. Being open, being supportive, and being realistic with each other is important. I know challenges will come as my lovely lady gets bigger. But because we've talked about them, it's just a part of our relationship. And it's an experience we're going to share together. And in my case there's no guilt of liking her at her size, because she's comfortable with it and enjoys it. We're both open with out feelings, and as such neither of us need to feel in any way odd about enjoying our shared desires.
 
As far as social stigma is concerned, yeah that's a two-way street. There's no doubt that larger women are stigmatized, but us men who are into them also get the odd shot across the bow from time to time. Really, you just have to be comfortable with your preference, be confident in who you are and what you like. My girlfriend stands tall as a proud, confident BBW. The absolute least I can do in return is proudly stand alongside her, no matter what people think of either of us.
 
Besides, I'm of the opinion that I have a hot date. Damn right I'mma show off that hot date to the world!
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Apart from the size difference stuff and problems with sex positions, none of the other negatives are real. Social stigma is an opportunity to change other people's minds. Snoring and other health issues go up as you get into higher levels of obesity... but dating isn't some game where you are trying to narrow down your type and you are playing the odds. Snoring is a separate issue. General health is a separate issue. Lots of women have bad knees, lots of women snore. Better not date any former soccer players if you don't like bad knees.

That being said, I probably do have a size limit, but I wouldn't phrase it in terms of numbers.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

While I am not going to rip into you like Luvpears, I totally see where you are coming from. 

The social stigma is something you will have to have emotional gymnastics over. 

The abundant reality is while we may furiously pull our collective puds to Echo, or insert terminal SSBBW here, we might not have the stomach for going down on a girl that well, frankly, smells putrid. "The reality of dating an SSBBW" is (or was) an ongoing thread on Dimensions. There was a dude on one of the Chans who talked about an SSBBW model doing escorting. He was jazzed, but said her stench just killed his boner. He wanted to slough through, to fuck his fat fantasy, but he simply couldn't.

This is a harsh reality of this community. I had a chance to hookup with a model, and there was a smell I couldn't place, but was enough for me say no. It happens.

My unwarranted two pence is find a girl that makes you happy. Remember, some anon on the Chans called me a "size 12 dating faggot". Only here can you get shamed for dating a smaller girl!

Remember, what makes a relationship is the girl's wit and personality. For every hot 10 walking around is some dude tired of fucking her.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 hours ago, KFD said:

While I am not going to rip into you like Luvpears, I totally see where you are coming from. 

The social stigma is something you will have to have emotional gymnastics over. 

The abundant reality is while we may furiously pull our collective puds to Echo, or insert terminal SSBBW here, we might not have the stomach for going down on a girl that well, frankly, smells putrid. "The reality of dating an SSBBW" is (or was) an ongoing thread on Dimensions. There was a dude on one of the Chans who talked about an SSBBW model doing escorting. He was jazzed, but said her stench just killed his boner. He wanted to slough through, to fuck his fat fantasy, but he simply couldn't.

This is a harsh reality of this community. I had a chance to hookup with a model, and there was a smell I couldn't place, but was enough for me say no. It happens.

My unwarranted two pence is find a girl that makes you happy. Remember, some anon on the Chans called me a "size 12 dating faggot". Only here can you get shamed for dating a smaller girl!

Remember, what makes a relationship is the girl's wit and personality. For every hot 10 walking around is some dude tired of fucking her.

Yes, yes, a thousand times yes.

And may I say its pleasant to see well thought out responses and not just a tirade of abuse.

As for your point, I'm able to ignore the smell with the ssbbws during the act but afterwards I feel so ashamed of myself for doing it. But when I am horny I do not care.

 

But still, I think my upper limit from now on is around 220lbs

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Do any of you guys who had such bad experiences had that happen when having sex freshly after bath? Because if not, that's a hygiene issue. Sure, that's related, because hygiene for SSBBWs is more demanding, but still...

From technical point of view, anaerobic bacteria have it easier to develop in places where, as the name suggest, air has harder time reaching. And anaerobic bacteria are making a lot of stink. Places like folds, deep belly button, groin and armpits are a nice example of where things can get worse when a person is very big. Especially when you pair this with increased sweating. But that still can be handled with more frequent hygiene. The problem is, washing 3 times a day is not exactly convenient and not always possible.

I married a moderate hygiene freak so I don't expect experiencing such problems anytime soon even if she suddenly gained closer to the SSBBW range. Which is rather unlikely anyway.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I have to say, the largest women I ever dated all had zero issues in the "something smells funny/bad/wrong" department. But they were also clearly a little hyper-sensitive about the potential to have those problems. (One of them would take at least 4 baths or showers a day. It was a little excessive. Another would change clothes constantly. "Going out to dinner tonight? I can't wear THIS. Let me change. Home from going out? Can't stay in THIS. Let me change. Etc. Etc.")

I've also had the unfortunate situation of dating a couple of much smaller women who had some hygiene challenges though. So I wouldn't be too quick to declare this stuff an automatic problem to cope with if you date women above a certain size....  Bigger women have to be a little more conscious of it, but either they learn how to manage that or they don't.

As far as the social stigma goes? I really do get that. Been there and had to learn to deal with it -- which took a lot of time and experience. It's not fun when you're out with your g/f, taking a romantic stroll downtown, when some ass-hat drives by screaming "Beached whale!" out his car window. (Yeah, that really happened to us once.) My g/f, to her credit, completely ignored it as though she didn't even hear him, but I know she did. Therefore, I ignored it too. I mean, what was I supposed to do anyway? Yell back and give him the satisfaction he pissed us off? Self-righteous people hiding behind keyboards on the Internet can lecture you all day long about being a jerk if you succumb to social stigmas. But it's something that's out there and can make your life really uncomfortable when you're in the middle of it.

Best thing for me was, honestly, getting older and having everything around me change/evolve a bit. Instead of caring as much what my buddies thought of me, it just stopped mattering because I no longer HAD a group of "good friends" I hung around all the time. Everyone got busy living their own lives and we all stopped caring about how someone else reflected on us.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 2 weeks later...

Must...reply...

Ate my GF for the first time last year, she of the 5'6 and 306 pounds.

Despite having just gotten off a plane, she tasted fine fine fine more than fine...

No stank. Not then, not now. She sure loves it, too. My pleasure. Had a GF years ago, of "normal" weight, whose vagina tasted like vinegar, quite disgusting as it's a vagina, not a salad. It really depends on the person. 

Re: Snoring - she doesn't. I do. Sometimes I even wake mySELF up. 

Social stigma: Not an issue. I have real friends who look to see that I'm happy, not whether or not my partner is whatever size. When I was in the 8th grade, a kid who didn't like me shouted, "Your girlfriend's an UGLY SKAG!" Rather than being insulted,  I laughed. I laughed because she wasn't ugly, and because his obvious attempt to "get" me that way just fell on its face. 

The only issue I agree with is the difficulty of some sexual positions, to the point where I don't bother to try. Sex is work anyway, as well as fun, and it's work with a supersize lady, hands down. It's fun and a delight to have someone like that in your arms, but intercourse is, plain and simple, more challenging with a very fat partner. 

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

20 hours ago, WhoDat said:

(...) Had a GF years ago, of "normal" weight, whose vagina tasted like vinegar, quite disgusting as it's a vagina, not a salad. It really depends on the person. 

(...)

The only issue I agree with is the difficulty of some sexual positions, to the point where I don't bother to try. Sex is work anyway, as well as fun, and it's work with a supersize lady, hands down. It's fun and a delight to have someone like that in your arms, but intercourse is, plain and simple, more challenging with a very fat partner. 

 

 

As for the first part - I noticed that some parts of Ms V tend to leave an sour sensation on the tongue, but in my case I wouldn't compare it vinegar - rather to licking a milder version of lemon. Which definitely is nowhere near disgusting.

As for the second, can I ask you a question? Is there any problem or discomfort with her being on top? I haven't felt any negative difference there between my wife being 200 and 240 lbs, since technically I feel the added weight, but thanks to softness it's distributed and never a problem. Is it the same at 300?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue.