Telling the Girlfriend

[justsomeguy1]

Well I thought this might be a good place to discuss telling my girlfriend i'm into feeding. We've been going out for over a year and things are starting to get serious. She is by far the smallest of all my girlfriends and the sex life is pretty damn good. As our relationship continues though I find myself very conflicted about telling her, perhaps because its backfired in the past a couple of times. I know that fantasy is different than reality and I love her very much but as time goes by I just realize that feedism is part of my dna. How should I approach or not approach this subject?

[Guest BlasterMaster]

A good start would be, after telling her how much you enjoy the sex you already have, ask her if there is anything she would be interested in trying. If you can create a open dialog about each others desires and fantasies it will help both of you being more comfortable to open up about any kinks that you have.

Also start with sexy foods like chocolate covered cherries or something, don't go whole hog and bring a sheet cake the first time, pace yourself and ratchet up from there.

[justsomeguy1]

Thanks that's awesome advice! I'll try to muster the courage to tell her.

[stolemy_hat]

A prickly situation indeed! If I was going to give any advice, it would be to make her understand that your preference is just ONE part of your sexual spectrum. It does not define you or set any expectation on her to conform in any way or participate within it. It's just simply part of the rich tapestry that makes up you and is nothing to be hidden or ashamed of. Best of luck.

[Observer10]

Frankly, in decades of association with the size acceptance movement, I've never known any girl who has been persuaded to enter into what would be considered here a feeder/feedee relationship. It is simply too controlling for most modern woman to give a man that kind of control.

That said, I've frequently noted many who have gained weight as part of a long-term relationship. The gain comes not from trying to gain per se; it is rather a side effect of mutual enjoyment. By this I mean the woman's natural tendencies when it comes to food and her partner's  preferences. This formula works especially well  when combined with a commitment to a larger life together in ways more than just size. 

I question whether "feederism is part of DNA."  What you may be is a hard wired FA who perhaps recognized his attractions to larger female classmates as early as elementary school.  This is a preference which varies in intensity between men, some of whom openly embrace but others try to minimize.  But preference is not a behavior such as feeder ism - the latter is an acquired practice . Like drinking liquor it can be fun  in moderation but disastrous if overdone or imposed.