Occasional frustrations

[Chriskin8]

Hi, everyone I just wanted some feedback of how some of you deal with the frustrations of dating someone who doesn’t share the fedish and wants no part of it, my SO is a little on the chunky side so it’s nice but I do find myself frustrated when she talks of working out in excess(I’m all for being healthy) now she knows about my preferences and has made it very clear she’s not interested which I respect and I love her very much so I was hoping someone could give me some advice as to how to cope with wishing she’d gain weight, not wanting to sabotage her and respect her choices because of that love I feel for her. She’s 5’1 and about 140-150lb range and I’d personally love to see her hit 180ish more or less but as stated above I’ll never force her, ask her to intentionally gain and she has no interest but I plan on marrying her so again only looking for an outlet or at least a place to vent my frustrations sometimes

[Guest BlasterMaster]

My advice is to be patient and don’t obsess over it. If she is already chubby then odds are she is only going to get chubbier as she gets older. If she knows your preference but is unwilling to partake in it then there is no point forcing the issue. If you love her and want to marry her, I would suggest popping the question and moving forward, nothing is better for adding weight than getting married.

[gggg]

Definitely be patient, and always make her feel beautiful.  Don't shove it in her face, because then it's more likely she'll have a bad reaction and start feeling even more messed up about it. Ease into it slowly, eat a lot with her, compliment her, and gently sprinkle in comments about how you like her curves.  Eventually she'll become more relaxed and comfortable with the concept of eating whatever she wants.

[extra_m13]

time is on your side my friend, patience and a yummi snack at hand for her will probably do the trick

[Voluptuouslover]

Great advise above.  I can tell you from my experience which sounds fairly similar to yours.

when I was dating my wife initially....girl friand  at the time. She was a workout queen that worked out 5+ days a week....she still had plump thighs, a little lower belly bulge and big breasts....at 5’ 3” probably 125 lbs at the time.  I found out later that she told me she used to be a little “Fatty”.... her words so I took them with a grain of salt.....although I saw a few pics later on and she was a Fatty by most peoples standards ....just not mine. I encouraged her to let up on so many workouts primarily to soend more quality time together.  She told me if she didn’t work out so much she would start gaining weight again.  I said I am fine with that and that I would love it if she got bigger.  She slowly started reducing workouts and we had more time together....the time togeher she we were just hanging and talking and she was usually snacking and we planned a lot more dinners together after work. Several weeks later the effects of her less workouts replaced by more eating and snacking showed up nicely on her figure in my thoughts.  She was bothered and complained that she couldn’t fit into her clothes and she was starting to get fat again.  We discussed weight gain a lot at this point and I was kind of young and immiture I guess as and FA at the time.  I obsessed and would want to weight her at least once a week, encourage her to gain more weight....at this point she had to buy a couple sizes bigger in her bras, jeans work clothes.....she probably only gained 20 lbs. but it showed up so nicely on her shorter frame....she was always curvy....now she had nice tan Fat all over her figure.  She started to look bloated and got up to 157 lbs. and was mad and disgusted by not only herself but me telling her how beautiful she was.  She ended up Calling me so strange for liking her so FAT.  She was need up dieting and working out again.  

Fast forward married and three b**s laters she packed on a bunch of weight and was more beautiful than ever.  Fast forward again she struggles to lose all the weight but eventually she’d most of it.  Currently years later again she is heavier but not her heaviest.

lie everyone says be patient, but her favorite fattening things but don’t discuss it.....she will eat it all and I will ended up refraining from weight gain talk at all unless she would bring it up.  I do sacrifice that these days but relish when she loses control of her appetite and packs on extra lbs.  the only problem is over the years I have seemed to like more and more weight on women in general and definitely on my wife.   My wife is probably 180-185 lbs. currently but I do crave for her to gain another 30-50 lbs.